A Forced Engagement
by Lolagemeow
Summary: Based on the film "The Proposal" Irina Spalko is threatened with deportation so makes Dovchenko marry her. Will they ever really love each other?
1. The Boss

Chapter 1

Irina Spalko was sitting in her chair casually reading a magazine. It was almost time for work but she didn't care, nobody would dare to tell her that she was late. She knew that everybody hated her at the KGB headquarters. Especially Antonin Dovchenko her second in command. He would do everything and anything for her because he knew what would happen if he didn't. She was a very successful woman; no one would question her work ethic. She finally decided to set off for work.

Antonin Dovchenko was running late. He ran as fast as he could to get his boss's coffee from the local coffee shop. If he didn't get there on time he knew what would happen. He didn't want to get in Colonel Spalko's bad books. He knew she was probably just strolling to work with not a care in the world as she always did, maybe he would get there just in time. The woman at the counter saw his rush and gave him the usual order. Then he ran as fast as he could to the headquarters. In the process of running to Colonel Spalko's office he tripped, sending her coffee flying. He would just have to give her his.

"Ah, Antonin, you got my coffee?" Irina asked.

"Uh yes" He lied, handing her his. He had failed to see a message printed in pen on the side saying "_Call me xx"._

"Why does someone want me to call them?" Irina asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh well, your coffee kind of spilled so I gave you mine" He said looking at his feet.

"Hmmm, I would prefer that you order the same coffee as me next time just in case you spill it, I'm not a big fan of lattes" She said, sitting down.

"Okay boss" He said.

"Right we have work to do" She smiled.

"Right!" Dovchenko said. The phone rang. After a short conversation he announced "Boris would like to see you in his office".

"Oh for goodness sake" Irina huffed. She got up and made her way to his office. She shut the door behind her.

"Hello Colonel" Boris said.

"What do you want Boris?" Irina asked.

"You know that job us asked me to do?" He asked.

"Yes, let me guess, you didn't do it?" She asked. He looked down and nodded slowly.

"Okay then, clear out your office, you're fired" She said.

"What?" Boris cried.

"When I ask for a job to be done I expect it to be done" She said. Then she exited. Just as she was walking up the corridor Boris came crashing out of his office.

"That poisoness bitch just fired me! She only wants me out of this place because she knows that I am better than her, yeah that's what it is isn't it?" He said looking at Irina.

"Boris if you do not go back into that office and get your ass out of here, I will have you taken out by security" She grinned. Defeated he slunk back into his office. Antonin was still in Irina's office. The phone rang again. He picked it up and then called for Irina.

"Colonel! The heads want to speak to you" He called. Irina was just walking back to her office. She turned round and went up to the head office.


	2. Deportation

Chapter 2

"Colonel Spalko, we would like to talk to you about your immigration papers" The head said.

"What about them?" Irina asked.

"They aren't filled out correctly" He said.

"And?" Irina asked.

"You are being deported" He said.

"What? I only come from Ukraine for Christ sake! I'm hardly an immigrant am I?" She cried.

"Technically you are, you can fill out the paperwork again but you will have to go back to Ukraine for at least a year" He said.

"What? That's not really ideal" Irina said. Just then Antonin came in.

"Alec just phoned in and said that he wasn't in today because he's celebrating his engagement" He said. Irina nodded and then got a very good idea. She looked from the head to Antonin who was looking at her very strangely.

"Okay, you see we didn't really want to tell anyone because you know it was kind of a secret but we're getting married" Irina said, standing next to Antonin and putting her arm convincingly around him.

"We are getting married" He said, when he saw the look in Irina's eyes.

"You're getting married?" The head asked.

"Yeah, I guess we were just two people that weren't meant to fall in love" Irina smiled.

"Yeah we were" Antonin nodded.

"Anyway we need to get ourselves to the immigration office" Irina said. Then she left and went back to her office with an astounded Antonin. She sat down in her chair.

"What?" She asked.

"I am not going to marry you!" Antonin cried.

"Yes you will because if you don't I will be deported and Boris will be back in the business and made Colonel which leaves your career in the KGB totally screwed because he will fire you" She smiled.

"Let's got to that immigration place" He said.

"Thank you" She smiled. Then they set off. Irina went straight to the front of the line.

"Can I speak to who's in charge please?" She asked.

"Come with me" The man said.

"Thank you" She said. They sat down in the managers office.

"Okay Irina so you are engaged?" He asked.

"Yes, I guess we were two people that just weren't meant to fall in love but we did" She smiled.

"You do know that if you are committing fraud just so you won't be deported you will never be allowed back into Russia again and you could end up in jail and you Antonin you will have a very large fine and at least five years in jail" He said.

"Okay" Antonin said. _What have I done?_ He kept asking himself that question over and over.

"To tell that you are not committing fraud we will ask you a series of questions that every couple should know about each other, if even one of your answers don't match up, we will punish you" The manager said.

"Okay,we were going to tell Antonin's parents about it this weekend" She smiled.

"Where do his parents live?" The manager asked.

"Siberia" Antonin said.

"Siberia?" Irina cried.

"You didn't know where his parents lived?" The manager asked.

"Of course I did I was just expressing my happiness" She smiled.

"Okay, of you go now" The manager said. When they got outside.

"Great! Now my career has the potential of being damaged because if you!" He yelled.

"It's going to be damaged anyway!" She cried.

"Right if I'm going to do this I want to be promoted to Colonel" He said.

"Whatever" Irina said.

"Oh and also, I want you to get down on one knee and ask me properly" He grinned.


	3. A long trip

Chapter 3

"What? In front of all these people?" Irina yelled.

"Uh huh" Antonin grinned. Irina scowled at him.

"No" She said.

"Okay then, I'm not doing it, goodbye Irina" He said, walking off.

"Okay! I'll do it" Irina sighed. She got down on her knees.

"Will you marry me?" She asked.

"Nope, say it like you mean it" He smiled.

"Dear sweet Antonin will you please marry me?" She smiled.

"Okay but I don't appreciate the sarcasm" He said. Then he walked off leaving Irina kneeling on the floor. She got up casting a cautious look around and then walked off. They caught a plane to Siberia the next day.

"The funny thing is I know all of this stuff about you but you have to learn all of this about me" Antonin said, looking in the binder the manager had given them.

"Okay then, what's my full name?" Irina asked.

"Irina Anya Sokur Spalko" Antonin said.

"What's my favorite food?" She asked.

"Lasagne" He said.

"And my favorite animal?" She asked.

"Bear" Antonin said.

"Okay that's a little weird" Irina said.

"Well I do have to work for you" He said.

"Yeah but still, how do you know this stuff?" She asked.

"Oh no" Antonin cried.

"What?" Irina asked. Then she looked out of the window.

"Oh my god" She sighed. Antonins parents were standing there waving "Welcome Home!" signs. They got off the plane and walked over to them.

"Oh look! There's my boy!" Antonin's mother said.

"And isn't he a lucky lad, all engaged" His grandmother said.

"Thank you" He smiled, hugging them. Irina came to stand beside him.

"Oh hello dear, you must be Irina" His mother smiled reaching out to hug her. Irina just shook her hand.

"Nice to meet you" She smiled.

"And you dear" His mother said.

"Come on then, let's get you home" They all smiled. They walked across the town and got to a boat.

"A boat?" Irina asked.

"Yes" Antonin said.

"Shouldn't I be checking into my hotel by now?" She asked.

"Oh! We cancelled the reservation, we want you to stay in our home as a family" His mother smiled.

"Oh fantastic" Irina whispered.

"Come on get on the boat or are you too scared?" Antonin asked.

"I'm not scared of anything" She said. Then she climbed down the ladder slowly. Antonin gladly put a hand on her rear to support her on her way down.

"Get off of my ass now" She said through gritted teeth. Then she got onto the boat. They travelled for about fifteen minutes and then they arrived at a big house.

"That's your house?" Irina cried.

"Yes, big isn't it?" Antonin grinned.

"It's ginormous!" She cried. They went in to find a big party for them.

"A party? Seriously mum?" Antonin cried.

"It's just a little get together to celebrate your engagement" His mother smiled.


	4. Parents

Chapter 4

"Congratulations" Everyone was saying to them. They walked into the living room where Irina was stopped by a waiter guy. Antonin went on into the other room.

"This is Siberian tradition" He smiled, passing Irina some food.

"Um no thank you" She said.

"Oh please, try some" He smiled. She put some in her mouth.

"Irina and I are getting married!" She heard from the next room. She spat out the food.

"I'm really sorry" She said, pushing past the waiter. She went into the next room.

"Come here honey" He smiled. She went over to him and whispered "What a wonderful way to tell everyone we're getting married".

"I couldn't resist it" He grinned. Antonin's father came up to him.

"So this is Irene?" He said.

"It's Irina, with an A on the end" She smiled.

"Well Irene you're a very lucky girl to have our Antonin as your fiancé" He said.

"It's Irina and yes I know, he's an amazing guy" She smiled. He nodded and walked off.

"So what's the story?" His mother asked.

"What story?" Antonin asked.

"How did you propose?" His mother asked.

"Well, I'll let Irina tell you that one" He smiled, sitting down.

"Okay then, where to start? Well, Antonin and I were going out for dinner to celebrate our anniversary of being together and I noticed that he was waving around a lot to the staff there" She started.

"Oh no, this isn't going to be manly" He sighed.

"And eventually he was beckoning one of them over and he brought is some champagne. When I went to drink some I noticed something at the bottom and it was a ring. That's when he proposed to me" She smiled.

"Aww that's so sweet" Everyone said.

"Yes it was" She smiled.

"Give her a kiss!" Everyone cried.

"No I'd rather not" Antonin said.

"Oh go on!" His mother cried. He turned round and gave Irina a peck on the lips.

"No a real kiss!" His mother cried. He sighed and then gave her a long kiss.


	5. A day trip

Chapter 5

"Okay, that was weird" Irina whispered.

"Tell me about it" Antonin laughed.

"Did you enjoy that?" Irina scowled.

"No not at all" Antonin laughed as he walked out of the room. Later that night they were shown to their room.

"So where is Antonin sleeping?" Irina asked.

"Oh don't worry, we're not like religious or anything so we know you sleep in the same bed, he'll sleep in here with you" Antonin's mother gushed.

"Oh great because we love to snuggle don't we honey?" Irina smiled.

"Of course" Antonin said.

"Okay then, we'll leave you to it" Antonin's mother said.

"Thank you and goodnight" Irina smiled.

"Goodnight!" She smiled. Then the door closed. Antonin ended up making a bed on the floor while Irina got ready for bed in the bathroom. Suddenly the door opened.

"Sorry I forgot to give you this" Antonin's grandmother came in and him a blanket. Irina poked her head around the door. Antonin kicked the covers he'd placed on the floor as a makeshift bed to the side.

"What a nice blanket" Irina smiled.

"I like to call it the baby-maker" Antonin's grandmother smiled.

"Oh! We'll have to be careful with that one then" Irina smiled.

"Goodnight!" Antonin's grandmother smiled.

"Goodnight!" Irina said. The door closed and Antonin got into his bed on the floor.

"Please don't look" Irina said, as she opened the bathroom door.

"I won't" Antonin said. She darted across the room in skimpy shorts and a silky top.

"You chose to bring those pyjamas to Siberia?" Antonin laughed.

"Well, I was supposed to be in a hotel room by myself" She said.

"Whatever, goodnight" Antonin said.

"Goodnight" Irina said. Then she fell asleep. The next morning at breakfast Irina was told that Antonin's mother and Grandmother were taking for a girlie day out.

"But I don't wanna go" Irina moaned as she brushed her teeth.

"Well you have to" Antonin said from the bedroom. Irina sighed. First they went shopping and did some sightseeing and then Antonin's mother said that there was a surprise. Irina ended up being taken to a bar.

"What are we doing here?" She asked. Then a stripper appeared on the stage.

"Oh brilliant" Irina sighed. The stripper started prancing around and then came off of the stage.

"Come on beautiful lady" He grinned. He wanted her to come and sit on the chair on the stage.

"No really I'm okay thank you" Irina said.

"Go on Irina!" Everyone cried. Irina let him lead her to the stage. He started prancing around her.

"Smack his ass!" Someone cried. Irina sighed and gave it a quick tap. Then she got up and sat down with Antonin's family. When they got home, Irina went and had a shower. Antonin came into the bedroom singing to himself loudly, he couldn't hear Irina. He went onto the balcony and got naked ready to have a shower. Irina got out of the shower and couldn't find a towel. She opened the bathroom door. A small dog started yapping at her.

"Oh no please can I just get a towel?" She cried. She went to step forward but the dog lunged at her feet. Then Irina saw a small rug and had an idea. She grabbed the rug and gave the dog a small nudge onto it then she turned it round and closed the door. She ran across the room and ran straight into Antonin. They fell on top of each other.

"Oh my god!" They yelled at the same time.

"Why are you naked?" Irina cried.

"Why are you wet?" He cried.

"I was having a shower, couldn't you hear me?" She cried. She ran over to the side of the bed and wrapped a blanket around herself.

"Oh my god your showing everything, for the love of god cover it up!" Irina cried.

"Why did you come out of the bathroom?" Antonin asked, wrapping a towel around himself.

"I was trying to get a towel but that dog was like attacking me!" She cried. Antonin opened the bathroom door and let the dog out.

"See! See! Exactly!" Irina cried.

"Ooh! Barely made it out with my life there" He said sarcastically. Then he went into the bathroom. Irina threw her head down on the bed.


	6. More about you

Chapter 6

They were settling into bed. Antonin's parents had said goodnight and gone to bed.

"So, so naked" Antonin said.

"Can we not talk about that please?" Irina said.

"Whatever" Antonin said. There was a moment of silence.

"I'm psychic" Irina said.

"What?" Antonin asked.

"Is that like a haha that's so funny?" Irina said.

"No" Antonin said.

"My parents abandoned me when I was seven, when Boris called me a poisoness bitch I sat in my office and cried and I haven't slept with a man in over five years" Irina said. Antonin felt a lump grow in his throat at the first part.

"Your parents abandoned you?" He asked.

"Yes" Irina said.

"And you haven't slept with someone in over five years!" He cried.

"That's all you're interested in?" Irina asked. There was another moment of silence.

"Irina, don't take this the wrong way but you are a very, very beautiful woman" Antonin said. Irina smiled to herself.

"Thank you" Irina smiled.

"You're welcome, goodnight" Antonin said.

"Goodnight" Irina said. Then they fell asleep. The next day they were woken by a knock at the door.

"Room service!" Antonin's mother called. Irina threw a pillow at Antonin's head.

"Hang on a second!" Irina called.

"What?" Antonin murmured.

"Your mother is at the door!" She whispered.

"Oh!" He said. He threw the blankets up onto the bed and got into bed with Irina.

"Is everything alright in there?" Antonin's mother called.

"Yes everything's fine, come in!" Irina said. Antonin quickly cuddled Irina. His mother came in and put breakfast on the table.

"Okay, we have a proposal for you" She said.

"Okay?" Irina said.

"We want you to get married here tomorrow" She gushed.

"What? Oh no, no" They said at the same time. Antonin's grandmother came in.

"But it would be a dream come true to see my only grandchild getting married, a dream come true!" She cried.

"Okay" Antonin said.

"So you'll do it, before I die?" She said.

"Yes, yes okay" Irina said.

"You will be getting married in a barn" Antonin's grandmother said.

"Oh! I've always wanted to get married in a barn" Irina said.

"It's a sign from mother nature that you were meant to be together, I must give thanks!" She cried. Then they left the room.

"Oh my god, what if they find out?" Antonin said.

"It'll be okay, we'll get a quickie divorce" Irina said, she reached out and gently started massaging his shoulders. He turned round and gave her a funny look.

"Sorry" She said. He nodded.

"I'm gonna go outside" She said. She found a bike in the back garden and went cycling in the woods.

"Woah! This is rough ground" She said to herself. Then she fell off of the bike. She got up and saw someone by a bonfire chanting.

"What the heck is that?" She muttered. Then she slid down the ledge. Antonin's grandmother turned round.

"Hello it is I, you must be a curious one, come and see how I give my thanks to mother nature" She said.

"You know what? I'm not that curious, I should be heading back.

"No, no mother nature has brought you and Antonin together" Antonin's grandmother said.

"Oh um okay" Irina said. She started off copying Antonin's grandmother but then she started getting into it.

"These sweatpants got my balls!" She chanted. She started wiggling her rear and jumping around. Then she realized that Antonin was standing behind her.

"Your grandmother told me to say whatever came to mind" She said.

"Balls? That's what came to your mind?" He asked.

"Uh huh" She said.

"Hmm, well you've got a few phone calls from the KGB so we're going to go into town and phone them back" He said.

"Okay" Irina said.


	7. Family

Chapter 7

Antonin and Irina went into town. They went into a corner shop and put some money into the public telephone.

"Go ahead and make your calls, there's a list here of who's called you and their phone numbers" Antonin said.

"Oh okay" She said.

"I'll leave you to it" He said then he went out of the shop. Irina made a few phone calls and then went to find Antonin.

"All done?" He asked.

"Yes" She said. They were about to go when they saw Antonin's mother and grandmother coming over the hill.

"Come with us dear" They said. Irina ended up being taken to a tailoring shop. She was given a yellow dress and told to go and change into it.

"This is going to be your wedding dress" Antonin's grandmother said.

"Oh okay, um it's a little loose in certain areas" Irina said. She came out.

"Oh don't worry, I'll sort that out" Antonin's grandmother smiled.

"Thank you" Irina said.

"Now where are your boobs?" She asked.

"They're here" Irina said, pointing to her chest.

"Oh yes, there they are" She smiled. Antonin's mother started crying.

"Oh are you okay?" Irina asked.

"Yes, sorry, I'll be fine in a second" She smiled, as she left the room. Irina looked at herself in the mirror.

"This is the finishing touch" Antonin's grandmother said, putting a necklace around Irina's neck.

"Oh wow" Irina said.

"It's been in our family for years, my great grandfather gave it to my great grandmother, you see he was French and she was Russian and that wasn't allowed in our family, it almost tore them apart" Antonin's grandmother said.

"Why didn't they split up?" Irina asked.

"She was a lot like you, strong and tough, wouldn't take no for an answer" Antonin's grandmother smiled. Irina let a few tears run down her face.

"Oh dear are you okay?" She asked.

"Yes, I was just worried that the sewing wouldn't be done in time" Irina smiled.

"Oh don't worry about that" She said. Irina got changed out of it and ran to the port where Antonin was waiting with the boat. As soon has he'd untied the rope Irina drove off.

"Hey!" He cried.

"I need to get away!" She said.

"From what?" He cried.

"I forgot" Irina cried.

"Forgot what?" He yelled.

"I forgot what it was like to have people that love you and a family that give's you things okay?" She cried.

"What?" He cried.

"What if they find out, your grandmother will have a heart attack!" She cried. She let go of the wheel.

"Irina watch the steering wheel!" He cried. She sat on the edge.

"As you said we'll get a quickie divorce and everything is going to be alright!" He yelled. He swerved the boat to hard and sent Irina flying out and into the sea.

"Oh now you decide to shut up!" He yelled. He turned round.

"Irina?" He cried. He saw her in the water in the distance.

"Irina!" He cried. He turned the boat round and sped towards her. He helped her in.

"You swerved the boat to hard and I fell out" She shivered. He put a blanket around her and held her close.

"Come on we need to get you warm" He said, rubbing her arms. He drove them back to the dock at the house.

"Can we have a little chat?" Antonin's father asked.


	8. The wedding

Chapter 8

"Your mother is never to hear about any of this" His father said, as he led them to a barn. The manager was standing there.

"I told you I would check up on you" He grinned.

"What?" Antonin asked.

"He strongly believes that you are lying about this engagement" His father said.

"I am going to offer you a deal, if you tell the truth now there will be no punishment and Irina will be deported just like that" The manager smiled.

"Go on son" His father said.

"No, Irina and I are getting married, I'll see you at the wedding tomorrow" He said. He stormed out with Irina in tow. The next day Irina was about to walk down the aisle. Antonin was standing at the alter with the vicar. The music played and Irina came down the aisle to stand at his side. The vicar said a few lines and then Irina interrupted.

"Can I say something please?" She asked.

"Can it wait till after the wedding?" The vicar asked. She shook her head.

"Okay" The vicar said.

"Irina, what are you doing?" Antonin said through gritted teeth.

"Thank you everyone for coming, this is a big day for you all, I've got something to tell you, I was about to be deported back to Ukraine because I didn't fill my immigration papers in properly so I black mailed Antonin into marrying me" She started. Antonin's father glanced over at the manager who was clearly enjoying this.

"I thought it would be easy to watch him do it but it turned out that it wasn't, you have a lovely family here and don't let me ruin it, I'm sorry for any trouble that was caused" Irina said. Then she left. She got on a boat to Moscow.

"So what happens now?" She asked the manager.

"Well, now that you're leaving voluntarily it all becomes very civilized" He smiled. Irina nodded. Meanwhile Antonin was running around in the garden.

"Where is she?" He yelled. His father grabbed his arm.

"I'm not going to let you do this son!" He yelled.

"Stop it! Stop it!" His grandmother cried. Then she fell to the floor clutching her chest.


	9. Racing

Chapter 9

His grandmother was put in an air ambulance. They watched her with the oxygen mask over her face.

"I told you two to stop fighting, it's tearing you all apart and I don't want that for you, promise me that you will stop it" She said.

"We promise" Antonin's father said.

"Good, then the spirits can take me" She smiled. She lay back. After a few minutes she opened her eyes again.

"I guess they're not ready for me" She said, sitting up.

"Excuse me sir I feel a lot better, take us to the airport, no need to go to the hospital" She called to the pilot.

"But.." He started.

"Ah! Don't make me call your mother!" She said. They went to the airport. The plane was already taking off. Antonin ran over to the person in the communicating area.

"Hey Jock! Stop that plane!" He cried.

"Hey Antonin buddy how are you doing? Hey I heard about the wedding…" He rambled on.

"Jock! Stop the plane!" Antonin yelled.

"Sorry no can do" Jock said. Then the plane took off.

"No, no, no, no!" Antonin cried, collapsing in a heap on the floor.

"Now he can't tell her" His grandmother said.

"Tell her what?" His father asked.

"That he loves her" His mother said.

"Sorry son, I didn't realize the way you felt about her" His father said. Meanwhile Irina was packing her stuff in Moscow. She was going to catch a plane in about an hour. Antonin walked in. Everyone looked up and gasped.

"Antonin, what are you doing here?" She asked.

"We need to talk" He said.

"Well, I'm sorry but I have a plane headed for Ukraine to catch so, Ivan could you put that over there please and…" She said.

"Irina! Just stop talking!" Antonin yelled.

"Okay" She said.

"When we first met I always used to dream that you'd get hit by a car or poisoned" He said.

"Oh that's nice" She said.

"I thought I told you to stop talking!" He cried.

"Okay" She said.

"But then we went away together and you checked me out when we were naked and you said about your parents, you can imagine how I felt when the woman I love got away from me" He said. She looked up at him.

"So Irina, I would like to go out with you, Marry me" He said. Everyone in the office gasped.

"Sorry Antonin but there's a reason why I've been alone all this time, I'm comfortable that way and I think it would be best if I just left and we forgot each other" She said. They took a step towards each other.

"I'm scared" She said.

"Me too" He said. Then their lips met in a passionate kiss.

"Show her who's boss Antonin!" Someone yelled.


End file.
